UNDERSTANDING SEXUALITY.

                                                 

                                                                                     

UNDERSTANDING SEXUALITY

Most of you reading this must be wondering - 

Why from FITNESS to SEXUALITY ?

As mentioned in my earlier blogs, fitness leads to joyfulness, a healthy and fit "body & mind" keeps you always motivated and perform better in every aspect of life, whatever age you may be in. If you are controlled by your certain thoughts, emotions & mind set, then you will mostly feel disturbed, there will be loss of concentration and get lots of physical & mental ailments. 

A healthy and active MIND - BODY connection is most vital for general FITNESS - may it be physical or mental.

As soon we as an ENERGY FORM get into a LIFE FORM on this planet, we get two things - a BODY & a MIND. As this LIFE FORM grows, this ENERGY or what we actually are , either takes full control of this MIND  & BODY , or the MIND takes over YOU & your BODY. If your MIND controls you, then you become enslaved to your thoughts, emotions, feelings, believes and imaginations.

There is nothing as a GOOD thought or a BAD thought, all are created in your mind having no relevance to your body or you as an ENERGY, provided you let them pass off as they come in. If you start resisting or engaging in your selected thoughts then, the mind starts playing with you effecting your body and wellness. 

Thoughts which make you feel disturbed, effecting your emotional and physical efficiency and condition are generally termed as bad thoughts for you, but the same thought may not be bad for another person, it is just that how it effects you or that person. Similarly, thoughts which gives you a feel good effect , motivates you & helps in enhancing your efficiency level are normally labelled as good thoughts. This also may vary from person to person. So, we can not label any thought as good or bad. 

When you are under full control of your MIND, then only certain thoughts engulfs you completely and starts playing with your emotions making you feel stressed , disturbed , agitated , a feeling of guilt creeps in, leading to lose your concentration on your daily activities , thus effecting your level of mental and physical efficiency. Such thoughts if prolong or continue for long duration then they stimulate release of certain hormones which slowly gives rise to numerous ailments in your BODY & MIND.

                                                    

 UNDERSTANDING SEXUALITY

We have a biology, we just can not put it under the carpet, it's there. It is best we address it for what it is. But right now the problem in the world is, because certain religious institutions in the world took this attitude that the very biology of the human being is wrong, because of this culture, started hiding it under the carpet. 

                                                              

Well in our Indian culture we never had it, but after the British came and left we became more BRUTISH than the British.  But before that, if we look at our old temples, all the outside temple art is all pornographic, if that is what you call them as. But we do not call it pornographic, we are only talking about various dimensions of HUMAN BIOLOGY. Because we do not see it wrong, but we see it as the periphery of LIFE. If you stay there only, then you will stay on the physical dimension for ever, you will not explore anything else. So, in the temple it is always in the periphery, as you go inside the temple it's totally different, then only you will realise the purpose of that temple. Similarly, in LIFE also, you are supposed to look at that and understand that it is the periphery of life and try to make an attempt to go deeper, then only you will be able to explore the different possibilities of this LIFE and see LIFE as it is. But at the same time not to be in denial of this periphery, or not to glorify it, this what is most important thing.

Then, IS SEX SOMETHING WRONG ?  As most of us were brought up to believe that sex is SIN. 

It actually depends on how we shaped ourselves. If we become wonderful human beings, it's one thing, and if we have become an ugly manifestation of humanity, definitely it is then a sin, sin is a stronger word , may be it is a mistake. So, too many mistakes are being made in the world, there is no question that you claim to appreciate, or worship the one who is referred to as the CREATOR, but you have huge issue with the creation.

If you do not appreciate the creation, why the hell should you worship the creator ? Someone who made a job of this the only way you can even be born is through sin, I think he must me banished. Now this is a fantastic device to keep people enslaved forever. If you do not allow them to come to terms with their biology, they will never come to terms with anything in their life. Always they will be dependent on an institution or a person or something who claims to have connections. You will always be enslaved to them because you feel guilty about your biology. This whole thing goes into more grosser and grosser states.

Except in certain cultures, everywhere else where dominant religious beliefs were spread, in all those cultures unfortunately they make you feel guilty of your very existence, because that way you will always be enslaved to whatever they have set up.

Something so fundamental as the menstrual cycle of women, she has to be always feel guilty about it as she is impure, her existence is impure. Unfortunately, I want you and all my other readers from all over the world to understand that if your mother did not have menstrual cycles, you would not have born, even if she met your father. 

So, the life making material unused is what it is, and if that is impure, your very birth is impure. That's what the enemy trying to tell you that your birth is impure, and to cover this is a whole lot of other stories, which I do not want to enter. Once you are not in terms with your own physical existence, you are essentially will never be in the terms with any other dimension of your life. This itself will cover you forever. 

This is a fantastic trick to keep you enslaved forever. No wonder institutions have lasted, though they have lost their relevance, they stay simply because your very existence you are guilty of. If you are guilty of your very existence, that means one or that which is the source of creation should be even more guilty. You are eternally guilty, and that which is created all this must be even more carrying the burden of guilt. 

Guilt & fear had been phenomenal tools to control populations. This has been successfully done for a long time. 

So, there are many reasons why one indulges in sex - for some it is just pleasure, for some it is a way of building this bond and companionship. Otherwise people feel they are going away from each other. They may be just fine, but lot of people it is psyched in their mind that if they are not sexually involved, they are actually moving away, this is NOT TRUE at all. 

You can be very close to somebody, you need not be involved in any physical manner, isn't it ? But societies have psyching especially in this part of the world, people are hugely psyched if there is no sexuality you do not have a relationship. In fact the word relationship, ( it took me some time to understand ) if you say relationship you are supposed to understand it sex-based relationship. Nothing else is a relationship. If I can have a very strong relationship with you and not be concerned about your body, isn't that possible ? I may not be drawn to your body in any way, but can have a very powerful relationship with you. But, all those possibilities are completely discounted, now relationship means you must be in some way physically involved man woman, man man or woman woman, what ever you like. 

There is a God of love & lust called KAMA, kama means lust. He hides behind the tree and shoots an arrow at Shiva's heart, it hits him and Shiva who was meditating gets little disturbed, then he sees it's Kama, then he opened his third eye, a fiery eye and burnt Kama, then Shiva took the ashes of this burnt Kama , smear himself. That is the general story told to people. 

But you tell me, your lust arises within you or behind the tree ?  It's  always within you. Desire is not hanging outside, it is not because a beautiful woman or a handsome man is sitting there, your desire comes, because the desire is within you, so also the kama is within you, so SHIVA opened his third eye and burned the kama within himself, not the one who is standing outside, because Kama never stood outside. Your lustfulness , your desiring nature never ever stood outside, only stood inside you.

Once you are enslaved by your lust, desire, greed, jealousy, anger and ego, all your energy get wasted on these & you miss the main essence of this LIFE. Among animals we are only called HUMAN BEINGS, so BE useful to others who need you, know your body & mind to keep them FIT, so that YOU can serve nature and other living beings.  Always remember, money, power, status are of no use, as you are not IMMORTAL. Instead, divert your ENERGY to Explore & Experience the various dimensions of LIFE. 

Use this LIFE sensibly, it's really short. At whatever age or stage you realise this, act from that day on wards. Sooner the BETTER.

Lust is not just about opposite sex, shopping is lust, because you have to go towards something only then life will be complete, every desire is lust, because without that I cannot exist. I want that, only because when I have that , this will be complete. Essentially lust means, it creates sense of incompleteness within you and longing for something that it makes you feel - if  you do not have that you are not complete. 

I do not know it may sound strange, but I think most people are like that. We spend lot of energy in our life thinking about the other sex and sexuality and all that stuff. Nothing changed about it. It's just that your intelligence has been hijacked by your hormones. 

It's not you, it's just compulsive behaviour, When you were a child it did not matter what reproductive organs somebody carries. Physical relation and sexuality are a part of life. Aside for reproduction, physical relation can be about intimacy and pleasure. 

Physical relation is an important part of life and overall well being. In relationships orgasms play a significant part in bonding, physical and emotional benefits, like reduce the risk of heart disease, improve in self esteem and more can come from having physical relation. It can help you connect to your partner, thanks to oxytocin. Oxyticin can play a role in developing relationships, you may find that consistent, mutual sexual pleasure helps in bonding within a relationship. Couple partners often  have increased relationship, satisfaction when they fulfil one another's physical desires. You may find positive growth in your relationship when you are able to express yourself and your physical desires. 

The whole dimension of spirituality or even LIFE as such is to grow beyond the physical, to taste something beyond the physical. If your involvement with the physical is very deep, naturally your attachment to the body is very strong. It is not SEX which can be impediment in one's growth in life. But once attachment to the body is deep then definitely it is an impediment, there is no question about that. 

Sex is a natural thing, it is physical, it is there in the BODY, but SEXUALITY is invented and created by human, it is psychological, it is in the MIND.

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